This is a really BIG deal! Just ask.

¡Hillary wins Puerto Rico!

Yay!

Joe Btfsplk*

The Washington Post’s Chris Cillizza has identified five people Donald Trump might tap for vice president. As a service to our readers (all half dozen), we have been providing one-minute biographies of these five: Iowa Senator Joni Ernst, Senator Bob Corker of Tennessee, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie, Oklahoma Governor Mary Fallin, and last, long-time political hack,

under a cloud since the early 70s

Newt Gingrich, (Newton Leroy) representative from Georgia’s sixth congressional district 1979-1999, minority whip 1989-1995, and speaker of the house 1995-1999 before resigning under a cloud, reprimanded for an ethics violation.

     Like Trump Gingrich has been married three times, each following an affair and each to a younger woman than the woman before.*

     Before he became a professional, paid politician (before he became whatever he is now), Gingrich taught history and geography at West Georgia College. Denied tenure he left in 1978. But then he did get the House gig.

     We should say that the former speaker’s divorces and re-marriages were the result of, as he pointed out in an interview with the Christian Broadcasting Network, “how passionately [he feels] about this country.”

     Cillizza writes that Gingrich was “a relatively early supporter of Trump,” having the kind of rubbery ethical spine the presumptive candidate appreciates. On the other hand, a fervent admirer of Dick Cheney, whose rubbery spine was made of linked steel, Gingrich may hope . . . .

_______________

*With apologies to the Al Capp character, who though he was the world’s worst jinx was also always well-meaning.

**His first wife – also his high school geometry teacher – was seven years Gingrich’s senior.

Past Tense

“Paul Ryan in many ways is the antithesis of Donald Trump; he’s everything that Donald Trump is not. He’s a decent human being. He is a conservative. He is steeped in public policy. He cares about ideas. He’s a person who conducts himself with civility and grace in public life. He doesn’t put down his opponents.”  - Peter Wehner, a former policy aide to President George W. Bush and a personal and ideological compatriot of Ryan’s for two decades.

We can put that in the past tense now: “Paul Ryan used to be the antithesis of Donald Trump; he used to be everything Trump is not. He used to be a decent human being. He used to be a conservative. He used to care about ideas.” No longer!

Fall in!

The Washington Post’s Chris Cillizza has identified five people Donald Trump might tap for vice president. As a service to our readers (all half dozen), we continue one-minute biographies of these five: Iowa Senator Joni Ernst, Senator Bob Corker of Tennessee, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie, and ...

The state vegetable of Oklahoma
is the watermelon.

The 27th governor of Oklahoma, Mary Fallin. A life-long pol, Fallin was also lieutenant governor for 12 years before serving two terms in the U.S. House. She has said she supports Trump “100 percent” and that she’s honored to be mentioned as a possible vice presidential choice; she’d definitely consider an offer. A Kappa Alpha at OU, she is twice married, to a dentist and a lawyer, both men.

Addendum. “You know you’re going to get shit about this,” Ted said. “Yes”, I said, “I know.” “And you know why.” “Yes. But I could say I was trying to look at it from Trump’s own point of view.” “Were you?” “You could say that.”

     “But what else should you say?” “I suppose that she was the first woman to serve as both lieutenant governor and governor of Oklahoma, the second woman elected to congress from the state; that she ordered the state’s National Guard facilities to deny spousal benefits to same-sex couples, she’s signed 18 anti-abortion measures into law, and she has gone on record as saying that she will refuse to comply with Environmental Protection Agency regulations to reduce carbon emissions - in fact she issued an executive order prohibiting state agencies from coming up with any emissions reduction strategy under the Clean Power Plan, the first governor, male or female, to do that.”

     “Better.” “Good enough?” “Better."

The round mound of unwound.

The Washington Post’s Chris Cillizza has identified five people Donald Trump might tap for vice president. As a service to our readers (all half dozen), we continue one-minute biographies of these five. The day before yesterday Iowa Senator Joni Ernst, yesterday Senator Bob Corker of Tennessee, today . . .

 

the round mound of unwound

Chris Christie, the 55th Governor of New Jersey, whose most effective predecessor, Wouter van Twiller (1633-38), purchased Nut Island—now, ironically, Governor's Island—from Canarsee tribe for two axe heads, a string of beads, and some nails and, more crucially, drove back a mob of rapist Virginians pushing up from the south trying to settle the Delaware Valley.

     Before becoming governor, Christie was U.S. Attorney of the District of New Jersey, where he doubled the size of the anti-corruption unit, so it could investigate Democratic Senator Bob Menendez for 5 years. (The investigation began during the race in which Menendez would defeat Christie’s mentor Tom Kean; Menendez was cleared in Oct 2011)

     Before that, the future governor served as a lobbyist, representing the securities industry’s attempt “to block the inclusion of securities fraud under the state’s Consumer Fraud Act.” (Christie’s wife Mary Pat Mary Pat has worked on Wall Street for Cantor Fitzgerald and Angelo, Gordon & Co.)

     Before that, born in Newark, Christie grew up in Livingston, where he was a catcher on the high school baseball team. Christie is an avid sports fan, showing up in sky boxes at Citi Field and AT&T stadium.

As candidate for governor, Christie proposed a 10 percent income tax for all state residents, but as governor he targeted his proposal at people earning less than $400,000 per year. Those above would pay 9 percent or less. He vetoed bill that would raise the minimum wage and became pro-choice. As a candidate, Christie said he would support aggressive enforcement of state gun laws, but as governor he vetoed legislation that would have reduced the legal size of ammunition magazines. He’s a fracker.

Christie launched his own presidential campaign in late June of last year. But he dropped out of the race after the New Hampshire primary and threw in with Trump, who named him to head of a transition team when he defeated “crooked Hillary.”

     Christie’s edge in the VP sweepstakes, besides his early sell-out, is in his well-deserved reputation as a successful busker of profane bluster unsupported by facts. He also possesses the kind of petty but pompous payback personality – say that five times fast without smiling – petty but pompous payback personality that Trump appreciates.